Mothers, Emotions, and Evolution
Mothers, Oh My!
Mother's Day can be triggering.
Interestingly, while mother-child soul contracts fascinate us, and our relationship to our greater mother, Mother Earth, is too esoteric for most, it's Mother’s Day—a made-up holiday intended to drive consumerism—that causes us the most consternation.
For your own mother, maybe...
you don't have a good relationship with her
she passed and you're still grieving her loss
you feel pressure to buy her something expensive
she lives far away and you miss her
you secretly dislike your mother and faked your way through a celebration with her
If you are a mother, maybe...
you didn't feel appreciated by your family
you are comparing your Mother's Day with what you see on social media
you still cleaned the kitchen, did the laundry, and made dinner
you feel resentful if your husband didn't make the effort when you try to make him feel special for Father's Day
or maybe you're trying to become a mother and it hasn't happened yet
Uncomfortable Emotions
There are a myriad of reasons Mother's Day might have brought up some uncomfortable emotions.
We do not like to feel discomfort in our bodies so we often just brush away or bury what we judge as "negative" emotions. We think it's easier if we just put on the I'm Great, You're Great, We're All Great smile and attitude.
While this strategy might be helpful in the short term to help us "get through," we're actually sabotaging our wellbeing in the long run.
Processing Steps
There are some simple ways to process our body's emotions—any emotion, any time—not just ones triggered by Mother's Day.
Presence—when we're busy future tripping, thinking, planning, and worrying, we lose any chance of awareness
Awareness—we can only change something if we know it exists
Curiosity—rather than judge a particular emotion as good or bad, appropriate or inappropriate, enough or too much, we can learn from the emotion when we are curious about it and what it's trying to teach us
Release—we want to be able to release emotions out of our bodies because that's how we keep our energy in motion. Emotion is simply energy-in-motion, e-motion
Think of a River
When water in a river is continually flowing, aka in motion, we can use that water for so much—drinking, cleaning, energy, transportation, enjoyment. If we dam the river, the water stagnates, becomes dirty, possibly even toxic.
We all know toxic people. I, too, become toxic when I get super busy and just start shoving things down in an effort to be as efficient and productive as possible. BTW, there's a reason why toxic positivity contains the word toxic—even positivity becomes toxic when it's not flowing.
No matter what kind of Mother's Day you experienced, I encourage you to slow down, pause enough to see what your emotions are trying to tell you.
#Worthit
Processing our emotions is how we learn, grow, and evolve. It's not always pretty, but it is always worthwhile!
Maybe you have a beautiful relationship with your mother and had an Instagram-worthy celebration. There's no right or wrong, good or bad. You can still use this framework to keep your emotions in motion.
If you'd like some simple tips on how to increase presence in your life, download my Free Guide Here!
This experience was literally one of the most stressful of my life! And that is saying a LOT given I’d already overcome years of infertility trying to get these amazing kids, survived cancer while completing grad school, and moved internationally three times in two years.