This Week My World Turned Upside Down

This week my world turned upside down.

I may have cancer and my dad died.

On Monday, my doctor instructed me to head to the emergency room after a second MRI proved I had a tumor consuming the C-7 vertebrae in my neck.

The tumor was excited to be there -- growing quickly and grabbing nerves along the way.

Finally, we had an explanation for the excruciating pain I've been in and the loss of control of my right hand and fingers for more than a month.

From the ER, I was admitted to our local hospital and assigned a neurologist, oncologist, palliative care doctor, and a couple of extra doctors I can't recall in the whirlwind – but it's a good team.

On Wednesday evening, I was discharged with a substantial hole in my neck, small holes in my arms, a solid neck brace. I was told to sit still while we await the pathology report as the skillfully removed chunk of the tumor needed further evaluation to determine next steps.

While it felt good to be home with my family, our dog, all my weird teas and elixirs, and of course starting the day with a hearty green smoothie, my father stunned us Thursday and transitioned.

Knowing him, he wanted to be of greater service and figured he'd have more flexibility without the limitations of his body. He'd never have allowed himself this gift consciously, but in the midst of sleep, when his brain wasn't on guard, he was able to release his silver cord.

Gosh, I'm incredibly happy for him! 💗

And of course, my daughter-body is grieving, too — for me, his grandchildren, and all who knew and loved his quiet, mild-mannered, yet stalwart soul.🥹

My dad was the eldest of six children and he was as much a rock to his immediate family as he was to ours. He's left a canyon-sized crater we're all standing around peering in wondering, Did this really just happen? How will we close this abyss?

While my emotions come in erratic waves, this is to be expected.

But my meds are messing with my physical body.

The pain pills make my eyes sleepy while the steroids give my heart an adrenaline rush.

So while I sit here in my emotional stupor, all jittery in the predawn hours contemplating life, I continue to write. 

This week, I have been updating our community – but only inside our Ascended Presence Circle.

Our APC community is where I have always felt safest to share my innermost reflections and perhaps impart some insights that hopefully inspire those who experience them.

This is not a sneaking sales tactic to try to get you in there, we're already a beautiful group.💮

It's a mere testament to the limitations of one human body to handle so much LIFE in such a compressed time. I need to focus my communications in one central place, both inbound and out.

If you would like to receive updates and possible inspiration for how you might extrapolate into your own life what I'm learning and how I'm processing all this, we welcome you to join our little corner of the internet. 🤗

As I need to focus my energy on healing the literal holes in my physical body as well as the emotional holes in my heart, please know I receive all your good wishes and healing light and love – and I am unable to respond to individual messages.

The easiest way for me to communicate is through the APC community portal so welcome there. If not, please know I'm still grateful to have you here.

Rest assured, I am using the tools I teach in my courses to help me process and move through this immense rebirthing portal I find myself in at this particular moment in time.

I could not be more grateful to have them in my repertoire and I'm excited to share them with you when I can finish the final tech details for a seamless course.

Because we all know, even though I just happen to be going through this life upheaval at this particular moment in time, you may be having your own either consecutively or will at some point in your life.

I'd love for you to have this same level of support whether it be our incredible APC community or the tools we work with, right when you need them in the immediacy of the moment.

Thank you, again, for all your love and healing energy!