How Not to Get Sucked Into the News
How Do We Stay Present with the News?
As any mother knows, many times the wonderful-to-stressful ratio of parenting is not 50/50. At times, the challenges can far outweigh the joys. Presence helps balance out the struggle.
I spoke to a group of new moms from Jenny Tucker’s Centerline Community last week. My goal was for them to learn how to use presence to increase the joyful parts of motherhood.
During the Q&A portion, one of the young moms asked how to stay present with so much bad news in the world. We are constantly bombarded with awful news and it can easily overwhelm us and cause despair.
Many people eschew the news altogether and if that strategy works for you, terrific. If you would like to be able to know what’s happening in the world, but not be so negatively impacted by it, there are some strategies that will help. Interestingly, they all involve presence.
Extract Yourself From the Matrix
First, we want to question our programming. Many of us believe news is news and worth knowing. We grew up with the nightly news, 60 Minutes, Dateline, and Entertainment Tonight. We read TIME, Newsweek, and the Sunday paper. We trusted these sources. No questions asked.
I don’t know if this was true when I was growing up, but certainly, today, the stakes are higher because there are so many different places where we can get our news. And that means these news organizations are DESPERATE for our attention. Desperate, I tell ya’, desperate!
Presence allows us to pull back our lens and recognize that news outlets are not altruistic entities. They are businesses, and their job is to do one thing: SELL ADVERTISING. They must make money for their shareholders.
Guess what sells? Fear. Drama. Scandal. Entertainment. But mainly fear.
Follow the Money
By taking this healthy skepticism into consideration, we can be more discerning in which news we want to allow into our consciousness.
Before we can have this high-level, bird’s-eye perspective, though, we must be PRESENT. We must be able to know if we have already left our body or not. Because where our attention goes, our spirit will follow, and if we’re not present to our reality, we will forget the “follow the money” mantra.
Your Soul Has Left Your Body
Perhaps you’ve experienced this yourself. You’re watching the news or scrolling on your phone and you can feel your attention leave your body and go into your screen. You lose track of time and awareness of your surroundings until suddenly wake up back in your body, in the present moment, perhaps a little bewildered, certainly more stressed.
(The reverse is also true, BTW. My family went on a tech-free trip pre-Covid and after 2-3 days of hellish behavior from the kids while they detoxed from their devices, we could literally see their souls return to their bodies. Their eyes got brighter and began to twinkle again. They were calm, pleasant, and downright fun to be around!)
Own Your Power to Choose
Remember, YOU choose where you put your precious attention. If you’re hanging out with CNN, Fox, Twitter, Dr. Google, or Ms. Igram, guess who you’re not hanging out with? You’re not present to yourself, and you’re certainly not present with your child or partner. You’re missing out on the joy that is right in front of you when you’re not there, ie, your spirit is not in your body. That makes you susceptible to getting sucked back into the matrix of fear.
Lift those pom-poms and let me hear you shout! What sells? Fear sells! What sells? Fear sells!
Presence is Key to Increasing Your Intuition
When you are fully present and inside your body, however, you can tune into your own higher knowing and with curiosity ask yourself,
—Hmmm...is this thing I’m worried about and spending hours researching, even a crisis I need to respond to or is this “news” hype to sell ads?
—Is this “news” helping me become a better person or the world a better place?
If it’s hype, move on or better yet, move your attention within to the information that REALLY matters to you — your own. If it’s something that will make you or the world a better place, maybe you give yourself some time to explore further.
Not Good or Bad
Notice that I am not evaluating the news as good or bad. We’re not trying to put on rose-colored glasses and say, I’m only going to follow “positive” or “happy” news.
Many news events can feel negative, but when we mobilize and use our outrage collectively at an injustice, then it’s actually helpful. We can become better people or help others going through a hard experience — think Greta Thunberg and the youth climate activists or the Black Lives Matter movement.
What we want to have is DISCERNMENT over what our eyes and ears let into our consciousness. What will we allow to distract us? What are we willing to sacrifice to scratch that distraction itch? This is a question we can all ask ourselves, but it’s especially important for mothers who are raising either our future leaders or mindless consumers.
Think of your soul as your personal home. Would you let money-hungry hooligans in to distract you from your purpose, your life, your kids, your partner? Even under the guise of important “news”?
No way, you’d slam that door shut and look for the helpers a la Mr. Rogers, won’t you be my neighbor?
The Weight of the World is Not Yours to Bare
Finally, know that we’re not meant to carry the weight of the world on our shoulders. In the Practicum, we talk a lot about not taking on other people’s problems. The same holds true for the world’s.
I know that sounds heartless, but the truth of the matter is we are better able to help others when we feel good, supported, and resourced. Then, from this solid foundation, we can give back and make a greater positive impact. Worrying helps no one. Presence is the antidote to worry because it helps us recognize all the blessings we have right here, right now, right in front of us.
FREE Guide to Increase Presence
To help these new moms on their journey to awareness, I gave them this FREE GUIDE TO INCREASE PRESENCE, which includes practical tips to keep you in the present moment and grow your intuition. Learning to pay attention is fascinating at all stages of life, so wanted to share it with you too!
This experience was literally one of the most stressful of my life! And that is saying a LOT given I’d already overcome years of infertility trying to get these amazing kids, survived cancer while completing grad school, and moved internationally three times in two years.